Episode 11 - Christina McGhee

This week’s episode is with Christina McGhee, a Divorce coach and parenting educator, speaker, coach and author. You may know about her through the Channel 4 series How to divorce without screwing up your children. 

She also contributed to the documentary 'SPLIT', a film offering an unfiltered look at how kids really feel about divorce.

Christina helped UK-based family law organisation, Resolution, create the first version of the Parenting After Parting course which The Parent Practice have just revised and presented in London with Family Lawyers in Partnership.

Christina is the author of 'Parenting Apart: How Separated and Divorced Parents Can Raise Happy and Secure Kids'.

Most recently Christina released Coparenting With Purpose an online course for separating and divorced parents that offers practical solutions and strategies to help parents manage their most critical co-parenting challenges.

She is a mum of four and bonus mum as well and says she is doing on the job training as a chauffeur, negotiator, short order cook and scheduler extraordinaire! She is the child of divorced parents herself.  She speaks about her own experience of divorce at 14 years old and remembers clearly the impact of her parents’ way of handling it, which was to not talk about it. Read more about how Christina’s own experience of divorce affected her here.


Listen to this episode with Christina McGhee if you want to learn: 

  • Some practical ways to navigate a positive course through separation and divorce

  • About the impact of the stress of divorce on the brain’s functioning and how to alleviate this

  • How to avoid some of the common mistakes parents make after the breakdown of their relationship

  • How to put children in front of mind throughout the uncoupling process

  • How to behave in ways that your children will look back on with pride

  • How to establish a two home concept; a warm, loving and connected relationship with both parents

  • How to be a business partner with your ex, even though the marriage relationship has gone

  • Why it is that the child’s self-esteem is damaged every time they hear one parent denigrate the other

  • What parental alienation syndrome really means and how to distinguish that from the child’s own choice to distance themselves from a parent because of the parent’s actions. Christina is clear that PAS needs professional support

  • Why a parent shouldn’t distance themselves from the children in the belief that they’re being respectful of the child’s wishes

  • When and how to tell the kids that mum and dad have decided they should no longer be together

  • How to deal with practical things like family holidays and handovers, schedules and communicating, including use of co-parenting apps such as Familywizard

  • That while you may not have the ability to make things better you always have the ability to make things worse… so don’t!

In our celebration of vulnerability and perfect imperfection Christina shares with us a Low Parenting Moment of her own which prompted she and her husband to join a parenting group which she describes as a gamechanger. 

And Christina also shares her top tip for raising children to be confident, happy and successful even if their parents’ relationship ends 

Links

To get in touch with Christina: 

Website: www.divorceandchildren.com

twitter: @christinamcghee

facebook: @divorceandchildren

linked in: https://www.linkedin.com/in/christinamcghee/?locale=en_US

Co-parenting with purpose course:  https://www.flourishtogether.com/catalog/coparentingwithpurpose.html?s=10816 

APPS FOR COPARENTS

FREE APPS: Available for iOS and Android

Talking Parent - https://www.talkingparents.com/home

A free replacement for email, text and other means of electronic communications. Talking Parents
keep an accurate record of all communications between parents including when communications are
sent, read and when parents sign in and out. Also assures parents cannot alter or change anything
that has been said.

Service can also be court ordered and is especially helpful for cases involving domestic violence
or high conflict.

Truece - https://truece.com

Co-parenting support at your fingertips. Truece provides a full set of tools to help you manage the
details of co-parenting; use it to track custody, record expenses, manage your family calendar,
keep a parenting journal, and more. Generate court-admissible reports to share with your legal team
or to keep for your personal records. Connect with your entire co-parenting community, or use the
app as a single user.

Amicable - https://amicable.io/amicable-divorce-app/

UK based app that helps coparents reach better and more fair agreements. In addition to helping
couples create a parenting plan, it also provides the ability to negotiate financial issues (i.e.
divide assets and create budgets for the future) Designed to make the process of splitting

up simpler, less expensive while paving the way for a positive future as coparents.


PAID APPS

coParenter - https://coparenter.com

This app helps you to effectively communicate with your coParent, to resolve disputes and help you
focus on whats really important - being the best parent you can be. You can communicate through the
secure coParenting messaging tool that logs all messages and requests between you and your
coParent. If you have a dispuate you can Get Help from an unbiased coParenting professional for
parenting mediation or one-on-one coParent coaching.

Coparently - http://coparently.com/

$99 per year per parent or $9.99 per month. Can use both online and mobile friendly. Use to
communicate, track expenses, keep contact info up to date and maintain schedules.

Can add kids to the account so they can use it to communicate with each of you about schedule
changes, items that need to go back and forth or when stuff gets forgotten.

Fayr – Coparenting Simplified - https://www.fayr.com

All features of Fayr are free for 60 days. The shared co-parenting calendar is free forever. After
60 days, access expense tracking, the location log, messaging, and unlimited reports cost for

$4.99 per month or $199 for lifetime access.

Our Family Wizard - https://www.ourfamilywizard.com

$99 per year

One of the communication tools specifically designed for coparents. Court approved in all 50
states. Offers option keep family practitioners (lawyers, counselors, mediators, parent
coordinators) informed in real-time.

Documents and organizes communications which can be shared with family court if needed. Tools in
app can manage exchanges, finances and parenting time. Offer discount for Military families.

GENERAL FAMILY ORGANIZATION APPS

Cozi - https://www.cozi.com

Cozi Family Organizer is a simple way to manage everyday family life. With a shared calendar,
reminders, grocery list and more. It’s free, easy to use, and available from any mobile device or
computer.Calroo - https://calroo.com

Calroo® family organizer app that helps busy parents stay organized and connected with NO ADS,
MONTHLY CHARGES or SUBSCRIPTION FEES.

Calroo provides one central place where you can see, plan and manage all of your family's
activities. With Calroo, you always know who is doing what, and asking a family member for help is
as easy as a swipe. Calroo is free and ad-free, keeping the focus where it belongs, on your family.

FamCal – Family Calendar

Combine calendars, events, tasks and notes in one place so that you can easily keep everyone in sync ...